Langsung ke konten utama

recently thoughts

Hello blog!

it's been loong time, I haven't post my story here. so much to tell, but I don't think that I could resuming all of those story.

but this time, i wouldn't tell you what happen after all this time. I want to tell something I thought lately. We all have friend or maybe friends. which one do you prefer? have a several friend but you can rely on or so many friends but you don't know they as much as you need to know?

I just realize, I'm lil bit overwhelmed to have good friends around me. okay, it's not like I'm not grateful with people surround me, but sometimes it's hurt when you think that you can not always stay beside all of them. scheduling to meet them one by one, because they have different way to play or to talk (if you have many pair groups from your stage of life). feeling guilty because you think that sometime you take sides.

and I just realize that I'm a possessive one. I feel jealous when my friends have another friend whom i know. yes I know their friend also. we have same school. okay, I tell you, maybe because of he is a man for me. my very best friend is a man. huh. but sometime i also feel like that to my girls. I know that I'm not supposed to feel that way. maybe because of my spoiled nature make me want to be center of attention

and maybe friendship between me and opposite gender, which is a man, will never work out. there will always baperness and other name to ruin each feeling. togetherness is kinda addictive for me which make me feel possess of something or someone.

the last thought is I think about marriage....
hah, it's a hot subject around my life recently. in the beginning 20 age, many friends of me decide to take more serious step, be wife or husband in young age. in my dudulness about feeling too much about togetherness make me want to take this step. but I know it's not easy and I'm not ready yet.

in the end, I just lift my hands and say all my prayer.
the only way to feel better, the only way to feel loved, the only way to feel calm.

why I write this? just to entertain you with my wild mind and also to practice my english. hahaha

remember to always happy! that's only what we can make for free by our own.

Komentar

Posting Komentar

Postingan populer dari blog ini

nonsense

Perasaan macam ini cukup mengganggu hari mingguku. Tampaknya ucapan rindu yang memperparah semuanya. Seharusnya tak kukatakan rasa rindu yang membuncah itu. Nyatanya rindu bukan karena tak bertemu, namun karena tahu bahwa keadaan takkan sama dengan sebelumnya. Karena kamu akan sibuk dengan dirimu sendiri, dengan pekerjaanmu, dan mungkin dengan gadis-gadis baru yang akan kau kenal nanti. Baiklah, memang aku berlebihan. Aku tahu kamu bukan tipe pria yang suka tebar pesona pada para wanita, tapi aku tahu kamu takkan bisa punya perasaan yang sama dengan perasaan yang aku rasakan. Itu yang membuatku cukup khawatir. Kamu tak seharusnya menyebutkan kata kunci itu. Aku terlalu lemah dengan kata itu. Meski kamu ngga berbohong soal itu, tapi maksud dari kata itu aku paham, bukan seperti yang aku inginkan. Tapi tadi aku sebutkan, bahwa aku pun sama sepertimu, yang ingin juga memiliki seseorang yang bisa menjadi teman berbagi apapun. Berbagi cerita, berbagi mimpi-mimpi,berbagi bahagia, juga be...
Posting Komentar
Baca selengkapnya

Moodboster kuuu

Pertama ketemu orang ini, pas SMP kelas 1. Gue bertemen sama dia bukan gara-gara kita seukuran (badannya), cuma yaa memang takdir yang menemukan kita :D. Yang gue tahu dulu tuh ini bocah maaaanja nya minta ampuun. Gue dan temen-temen yang lain suka kesel ngadepin ini anak karena kemanjaannya dia. Pas naik kelas 2, akhirnya gue pisah kelas sama dia. sempet bersyukur (aih jahat nya gueee), tapi kita tetep temenan kok. Kalau saling papasan, pasti ngobrol dulu, biasa lah anak cwe suka rumpi hahaha. Kalo ke kantin suka makan bareng. Oia, ini bocah kalo di sekolah biasanya bawa bekel, dan bekelnya selalu dimakan sama bocah yang lain. dia mah suka bagi-bagi orangnya. baikkan? Eia, gue lupa memperkenalkan ini bocah. Namanya Edwina Maria Cornelia Funck, memang seperti nama orang nasrani, tapi dia pure muslim kok. Anak pertama dari pasangan Alm. Bapak Eduard dan Ibu Titin. Punya adek namanya Geovani (gue ngg tau nama panjangnya). yaaa itu deh sedikit tentang dia. Eh iya, dia masih SINGLE tu...
Posting Komentar
Baca selengkapnya

aku ingin berhenti!

pokoknya aku ingin berhenti! tak ada alasan lagi! aku ingin berhenti! berhenti berharap jadi bunga matahari yang cerah ceria yang mengisi harimu. berhenti berharap jadi orang penting dalam hidupmu.. namun satu saat kau mampu rasakan, bagaimana rasanya tak ada aku.  mungkin saat aku lelah mungkin saat aku bosan mungkin saat aku lebih dulu mati.
Posting Komentar
Baca selengkapnya